and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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