I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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