i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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