Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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