angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Two words: blizzard sex
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
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