its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
