well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
