I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
