It's Friday. Sex?
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
