The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
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