I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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