i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
