It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
