The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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