Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize