why didn't you poke me back
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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