I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
