you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
