is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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