I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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