why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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