how do flat chested girls get laid?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
3 2 1 whiskey
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
