hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
