He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
