How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
