I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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