P.S. I can't hear my feet
i dont even know how to be here
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
