at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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