I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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