the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You smell like stripper and shame
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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