I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
