So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
