Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
