it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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