Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Randomize
