dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
