soooo we both peed the bed last night...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
