Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
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