i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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