don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
