Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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