I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
