She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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