Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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