yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
