Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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