White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
