you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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