You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
