Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
